Getting the Puberty Conversation Started with Your Daughter

| March 31, 2014 | 7 Comments

Has your mom tried to talk (Small)

One day my daughter was starting school in Jr. Kindergarten, and the next thing I know she was blossoming into a tween! How the years go so fast is beyond me! I could tell her body was already going through physical and emotional changes associated with puberty. If you have a tween/teen, you know what I am talking about: the mood swings, the need to purchase a bra, the insecurity about her appearance, and more. Eventually, with these changes, will come many questions from your daughter. I think as a parent it’s important not to rely on what they were taught in school about puberty and really have the talk with her. Even if she would say, “I know Mom”, I would ask her to tell me what she understood. Also listening to her concerns is extremely crucial, keeping the lines of communications open as well as letting her know that you are there for her.

For us, talking about being a woman would often happen at bedtime when she was relaxed in her bed and be more open to discuss puberty. She would have all of my attention and the same with me, just the two of us with no distractions. It’s a good idea to start the conversation at an early age like eight or nine years old, so your daughter won’t be frightened if she gets her first period earlier than anticipated.  Most periods will start between the ages of ten and thirteen years old. One of my daughter’s friends was only nine years old when she had a first period, while my daughter was fourteen when she experienced hers.

My mom inspires me! (Small)

To make her feel at ease, our first conversation was more about how it was when I had my first period and sharing my feelings and experiences with her. I was honest in my approach, and even mentioned that she might have some pain in the lower abdominal area and showed her. I didn’t want her to start panicking if she was not at home when it happened, so she would know that these symptoms were quite normal and that there was nothing to worry about.

The second conversation was more on the physical and emotional changes she would be experiencing:

  • the pubic hair growing in places she would not ever image,
  • her breasts developing,
  • the need for a bra,
  • how she could be cranky at times,
  • not all girls will develop these changes at the same age

Throughout the years, we have had many more talks and still do to this day (she is now nineteen years old).  It’s nice to know that she values my opinion and trusts my judgement. For tips on how to talk to your daughter about puberty, you can visit Always Changing website sponsored by P&G, the experts in feminine care with Always & Tampax.

And when the day came, my daughter’s first period happened at school in grade 9 and she had an Always pad in her school bag. She knew what to expect and was prepared for it. Congratulations, you are now officially a woman! A celebration is in order!

 

Although this post has been generously sponsored by Always, the opinions and language are all my own, and in no way do they reflect Always.

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Category: Family, Mother-Daughter

About the Author ()

Lyne is happily married and has two teenagers: a 19 year old son and a 22 year old daughter. She is a Certified Infant Massage Instructor (CIMI), Certified Professional Wedding Consultant, and an Event Planner. It has always been her dream to create a website dedicated just for Moms since her children were young. Thus, after 10 years, she finally accomplished it, and the Ottawa Mommy Club was born in May 2011. She was also the Queen B of the BConnected Conference, Canada's Digital Influencer and social media Conference in Ottawa and Toronto. She coordinated the Annual Infant Information Day/Early Years Expo for the City of Ottawa for 8 years. She was also the co-chair of the Navan for Kraft Hockeyville 2009-2011 committee that organized five community events within 6 months, and helped Navan reach the top 10 finalists in Canada. In April 2011, she received the Mayor's City Builder Award.

Comments (7)

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  1. Jenn says:

    What a great post! I have always laughed at my DH because We had two boys and it was going to be his job. The first thing I though when I knew I was having a girl was AH the dreadful period talk!! I love the way you approached it and will try the same with DD2…..we have a few years!!!

  2. Ladena says:

    I know I will have to have this talk with my DD in a few years. I totally agree that talking about your own experience is a good way to start. Thanks for the post. It’s very helpful!

  3. Great story to share! I’ve always been very open with my DD (6). When she asks questions (which she does a lot) I always give her an age appropriate,truthful answer. Because she is so inquisitive, I have had a lot of opportunity to share the ins and outs of mensuration.

    Thanks for sharing your experience.

  4. Stephanie says:

    I am dreading this talk more than life itself. 🙂 Thanks for the tips.

  5. Gingermommy says:

    My daughter was prepared as well. Best for them to know than be scared. Girls all go through this at very different times. I always was open to answering questions as well. This post will surely help many parents with the conversation.

  6. I am not sure that I ever will be truly ready for that talk with my baby! LOL! But these are fabulous tips and certainly will come in handy when the time comes.

  7. kathy downey says:

    Oh how I remember these fun talks with the girls,always remember to be honest and open

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