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How to Handle Toddler Tantrums

Let’s admit it. Parenting is hard. And dealing with temper tantrums can be harder. If you’re a momma who’s emotionally and physically drained thanks to your little one being a bit too difficult over possibly anything, here’s a little something to help. Keep reading to discover super effective ways to deal with your toddler’s tantrums!

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Improve Toddler Behaviour

The toddler years are difficult, there’s no doubt about it. All of a sudden your little child feels like the world revolves around them, they may have started demanding things and at times can be completely unruly. Toddler behaviours are completely normal. Tantrums come because they aren’t quite sure how to handle their emotions. Toddlers also haven’t learned much about the bigger picture in life, having compassion for others or empathy. While some toddlers may be the easiest children ever, overall most parents struggler with varying behaviours during the toddler raising years. I am sharing a few tips below to improve toddler behaviour so that your days can be less challenging and, hopefully, can avoid tantrums.

Let’s have a look at some tips to improve toddler behaviour:

Prioritize Rules

Toddlers have a short attention span, so trying to give them too many rules of the household at once will certainly be asking for misbehavior. Start by having rules based on safety, such as not touching the stove, electrical outlets and so forth. Once your toddler seems to comprehend the safety rules, you may gradually add in other rules. Be sure to remain consistent in the rules so that your toddler understands the rules are the rules. Period.

Show Love

Your toddler is going through a change of life now, as they learn to talk more and experience deeper emotional responses. While your toddler may be acting out, having a tantrum, or whining, internally they feel sad or angry. Be certain to show love to your toddler, most of the time they simply want your attention. Toddlers will work to get an attention they are able to get. Be proactive by showing love, aka positive attention, more often so that you curb the bad behavioural patterns based on simply needing attention.

Use Distraction Techniques

Instead of having the normal response of no to scenario’s where your toddler is doing something that you don’t want them to do, try to distract them. The distraction technique is where you try to get your short attention spanned toddler focused on something that they can do. This can be a particular toy, television show, or some tie listening to you read a book to them. Using this technique will improve toddler behaviour and avoid tantrums as it works to guide their attention from desiring to do the wrong thing.

Know Your Toddler’s Limits

Every child has a limit of stimulation during the day, you should pay attention to the cues from your toddler that shows they’ve had enough today. This will help with limiting tantrums. Once you have figured out what your toddler’s limits are, you can then incorporate a nap time or quiet time into the day during those unruly hours. This time can be used for you to nap, catch up on work or sit quietly to enjoy a break in parenthood. Making sure you’re aware and respectful of your toddler limits will truly improve their behaviour.

Set Consequences

Lastly, you will have to use consequences for bad choices. During the toddler years, your child will make bad decisions even if they should know better or aren’t even at their “bad time of day”. The act of testing boundaries and rules is going to be something you battle as a parent throughout the years of raising children. During the toddler years, you may set consequences that you are comfortable with and be sure the consequence fits the crime.

How To Deal with Toddler Tantrums

See below effective ways to help with toddler tantrums:

1. Make Eye Contact

There’s a lot of scientific evidence to back up the fact that establishing eye contact with someone (even your kid) tends to make you have a much larger impact on them. So instead of screaming and yelling at him when he’s in the middle of a tantrum, bend down a little, look into his eyes and speak to him in a firm, clear yet easy tone.

2. Give Him the Choice

Almost all toddlers throw temper tantrums when they experience a loss of power. So instead of flat out disagreeing with him or ignoring his demands, give him a choice to make. For instance, if your kid is making a big scene about his bedtime, ask him whether he’d like to put on his pyjamas first or go take a nice bath? Give him the chance to make small decisions himself.

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3. Don’t Lose It

There are going to be times when your child might be unreasonably difficult to deal with, but no matter what, don’t lose your calm. If you lose control, you’ll just end up encouraging your toddler to throw more tantrums whenever he wants to get his way.

4. Stay Away from Triggers

You know your child better than anyone else does. You know the triggers, and undoubtedly, one of the best ways to tackle those tantrums is to stay away from the potential triggers. In case of toddlers, it may be when they’re not fed on time, or when they don’t get enough sleep. In older kids, it may be issues with school or peer pressure.

5 Ways to Deal with your Child’s TantrumsPin
5 Ways to Deal with your Child’s Tantrums

5. Ditch the ‘No’

This one’s probably the golden rule when it comes to tackling temper tantrums in kids. Ditching the ‘no’ doesn’t mean you have to say ‘yes’ to everything, but it’s just about avoiding the negative words that make your toddler feel defeated and powerless. In most cases, kids throw temper tantrums when they experience a power struggle, so don’t let it be a battle between yes and no. Use your words smarty and win it!

There you have it some tips to deal with your toddler’s tantrums, and also to improve his behaviour. This stage of parenthood will be difficult at times and you will wonder how in the world you will make it through, but you can survive. Use these tantrum tips to help inspire you to switch up your mindset into one that allows your toddler’s behaviour to improve naturally with distractions, positive attention, consistent rules and consequences.

Lyne Proulx
Lyne Proulxhttps://ottawamommyclub.ca/
Lyne Proulx is a Certified WEBB Bodywork Pet Practitioner, Certified Infant Massage Instructor (CIMI), Certified Professional Wedding Consultant, and an Event Planner. She loves all things Disney and is an avid teaholic and chocoholic. She coordinated the Annual Infant Information Day/Early Years Expo for the City of Ottawa for 8 years. She was the Queen B of the BConnected Conference, Canada's Digital Influencer and social media Conference in Ottawa and Toronto. She was also the co-chair of the Navan for Kraft Hockeyville 2009-2011 committee that organized five community events within 6 months, and helped Navan reach the top 10 finalists in Canada. In April 2011, she received the City of Ottawa Mayor's City Builder Award.

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  1. Nice tips.. I don’t usually deal with children but I will use these if I ever have to. Giving them space is important

  2. Oh, how I could have used these tips this afternoon! One of my husband’s grandkids had a lunch-long meltdown at the restaurant.

  3. These are great tips . I sometimes have to deal with temper tantrums from my nieces , not so much fun in public .


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