Recently I’ve been feeling the need to defend my decision to support my 14 year old daughter in her desire to wear make – up. Several Moms I know have voiced their disapproval and have made statements such as, “You’re contributing to the self-esteem issues of young girls by allowing this. They need to be encouraged to take pride in their natural beauty instead of caking on fake faces.” Another, “How can you say you support the empowerment of women and girls while you are encouraging your own daughters to be someone they’re not.” Insert my frazzled look of frustration here as I stare at their platinum style hair and dark eyebrows.
You parent the way you want to parent and I will parent my children, my way. After all, are we not all seeking what’s best for our children? We want them to have fun and learn and experience cool opportunities in life. We want them to be healthy, safe and learn to love themselves. I am doing the best I can to act based on my intuition that gut feeling that so many of us have been trained not to trust. We’ve grown up in a largely fear based society. I have so many phobias, you’d be reading for days if I listed them all. I don’t want that for my children.
What does all of this have to do with my 14 year old daughter Sydney wearing make up? I could listen to those snap judgements, second guess myself and ground her from all forms of facial disguise until she is an adult. Why would I do that? Because part of me is afraid that other Moms will not accept me. I don’t want to look like a bad parent or poor role model for my girls.
Why am I supporting my 14 year old daughter in wearing make – up? The reasons are none of any one’s business but here is some food for thought. Up until a few months ago, Sydney was experimenting with make up provided by other girls at school. Not healthy considering the bacteria that can be spread from unclean utensils, etc. I can not be with her 24/7 and I don’t want her to feel bad about herself because she is going against my wishes. Picking my battles here. I decided to take her to Terra 20, a fairly new Eco store in Ottawa with a variety of natural cosmetics without the chemicals and potentially harmful ingredients found in cheaper brands that many teen girls purchase. Terra 20 has knowledgeable staff who will help match the right cosmetic for your skin type and pocket book. I highly recommend you go see Thierry Papineau at Terra 20 at the Pinecrest Shopping Centre. He has an extensive background as a make up artist with an impressive portfolio and he knows the products! Thierry helped Sydney match a powder foundation and eye liner to her colouring. He also helped her pick out a travel brush with a cap to keep it clean. Then he explained the importance of not sharing make – up and keeping your utensils properly disinfected. He also recommended healthy skin cleansing products. The experience helped Sydney learn proper application methods and the importance of good hygienic practices. It helped her gain confidence in herself and her ability to make good choices instead of me making them for her. Oh, and for the lips, we all use the Green Beaver gloss, way cheaper, healthier and environmentally friendly than Burt’s Bees and it’s a local company from Hawkesbury, Ontario.
Terra 20 gift cards make an excellent Christmas present for teen girls.
I have had the opportunity to interview several people involved with Terra 20, including the founders from right here in Ottawa to the buyers responsible for bringing products into the store. As a Mother and community member concerned with health and the environment, it gives me greater peace of mind knowing Terra 20’s staff has done a lot of the research for me. Terra 20 also features products from several companies who give back to various causes through proceeds of sales.