Who’s Your Parenting Idol?

| January 28, 2013 | 5 Comments

Uncle John, Lola, Lyn

Uncle John, Lola, Lyn

Being a parent is hard! Parenting can be difficult, challenging, rewarding and sometimes, let’s face it, not so great right? Where do you go for your parenting mojo? There’s always caffeine around to at least help wake you up to deal with this seven-day a week gig and a plethora (I’ve always wanted to use that word but find it kind of obnoxious but need to cross it off my bucket list so thank you) of television shows, magazines, online forums (yeah you Facebook) and books! Lots of expert books on all kinds of parenting I haven’t even heard of and sometimes reading too much makes me feel very underrated as a parent or gives me an entire new set of stuff to worry about and trust me, I already have a pretty long list all on my own!

If someone asked you where you got your parenting style from what would you say? Would you quote an author, a world-renowned child expert, your family doctor, your own parents or  maybe yourself?

I think everyone’s answer is different on this one. Our own history as a child and how are parents interacted or didn’t interact with us certainly plays a part in our own parenting. That’s obvious. But what isn’t obvious is where everyone goes to get advice and what they do with it once they have it. For me, being a motherless daughter and being a mother myself has led me down quite an independent path when it comes to parenting and its had its pros and cons for sure.

I read somewhere quite recently and while it wasn’t about parenting I think it applies here. It was something like when you see something you want, to go out and be around others that have what you want, find out what they are doing, do some of that and then add some of your own ingredients and then you’ll be there. I like this and think it’s pretty straightforward.

This made me think about my Uncle John and his wife Lyn. Over the years, I’ve always been in awe of their parenting. Their practical side, their supportive yet non-intrusive ways, their love for their children and each other and their commitment to raise law-abiding, responsible, autonomous, self-reliant children that know there is choice out there in the world.

Of course this is my opinion and observation but I am not alone in this at all. I have spent many holidays, visiting their summer home in New England and get to see first hand their respect for each other and for their children now that they are all grown and having families of their own.

If I had to classify or define their parenting style I would say it was strict, informational, empowering, full of adventure, travel, full of rich experiences and accountable, if that even makes sense.

Their children are now all on their own, living their independent lives, nurturing partnerships, parenting their own children and managing careers AND they still enjoy their parents’ company, are open to their advice, often soliciting it themselves.

From watching them I’ve learned that making it important for everyone come together for a special occasion or holiday has resulted in a unified group (even when some are living across the world) as they have matured and aged, still holding the special bond of family dearly.

For me this has been fascinating, a learning experience and sometimes there’s been  ‘wow’ moment along the way.

Am I as strict as they were? No, but times are different just as much as I am different from them. Have I picked up some ideas from watching them over the years? Definitely! And I took them and mashed them all up with my own and made my own recipe just like the advice I read that someone wrote about achieving success.

Uncle John and Lyn are still married after several decades and then some. They are still partners, carrying and respecting of each other and their three amazing children. They are part of my recipe for parenting with a dash of this and that mixed in. They are parenting superheroes and you would be lucky to meet them.

xo Lola

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Category: Education, Family, Moms, Relationships

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Comments (5)

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  1. Kamerine says:

    I think it’s great you have such amazing people in your life. And what a great way to look at parenting: a little of this and a little of that!

  2. kathy downey says:

    You are a lucky lady

  3. kathy downey says:

    Everyone needs people

  4. kathy downey says:

    Being around people who ove you certainly forms who you are as a person

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